Lonesome
(2022-2023)
While I struggle to articulate so many emotions that have enveloped me during these times, I felt a compelling need to organize these feelings. My intent is to leave behind something meaningful that captures the essence of those times. They are moments that can never be reclaimed, yet they linger in my mind. A blend of both precious memories and an aching loneliness.
The emotions I carry from this period can often be distilled into a single word: “emptiness.” This word encapsulates a profound sense of absence and longing, yet it also signifies a pivotal aspect of my life that demands acknowledgment. It is during these times of introspection that I discovered a deeper understanding of myself and my place.
In those moments I found myself engaging in profound contemplation about the nature of life and existence. It was as if the relationships I had carefully nurtured and all my accomplishments froze in time, allowing me to pause and truly assess their significance. I was left to confront the reality of my feelings to grapple with the loneliness that accompanied this emptiness.
I recognize that I am still faced with a multitude of unanswered questions. Despite this uncertainty, I do not feel compelled to find the “right” answers. Instead, I’ve learned to embrace the ambiguity of my journey. I understand that this is a path I must walk patiently and simply on my own. Each step forward may not always bring clarity, but it fosters a sense of resilience within me. In this acceptance of my journey, I find strength and a renewed sense of purpose, trusting that the experiences, both good and challenging, shape who I am becoming.
While I struggle to articulate so many emotions that have enveloped me during these times, I felt a compelling need to organize these feelings. My intent is to leave behind something meaningful that captures the essence of those times. They are moments that can never be reclaimed, yet they linger in my mind. A blend of both precious memories and an aching loneliness.
The emotions I carry from this period can often be distilled into a single word: “emptiness.” This word encapsulates a profound sense of absence and longing, yet it also signifies a pivotal aspect of my life that demands acknowledgment. It is during these times of introspection that I discovered a deeper understanding of myself and my place.
In those moments I found myself engaging in profound contemplation about the nature of life and existence. It was as if the relationships I had carefully nurtured and all my accomplishments froze in time, allowing me to pause and truly assess their significance. I was left to confront the reality of my feelings to grapple with the loneliness that accompanied this emptiness.
I recognize that I am still faced with a multitude of unanswered questions. Despite this uncertainty, I do not feel compelled to find the “right” answers. Instead, I’ve learned to embrace the ambiguity of my journey. I understand that this is a path I must walk patiently and simply on my own. Each step forward may not always bring clarity, but it fosters a sense of resilience within me. In this acceptance of my journey, I find strength and a renewed sense of purpose, trusting that the experiences, both good and challenging, shape who I am becoming.
